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Printed Silk-twill Kaftan - Antique rose Dolce & Gabbana aG8Zzj
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The Carters – “APESH*T” – Art Direction by Jan Houlevigue Childish Gambino – “This Is America” – Art Direction by Jason Kisvarday J. Cole – “ATM” – Art Direction by Miles Mullin Janelle Monáe – “Make Me Feel” – Art Direction by Pepper Nguyen SZA – “The Weekend” – Art Direction by SZA and Solange Taylor Swift – “Look What You Made Me Do” – Big Machine Records – Art Direction by Brett Hess

Ariana Grande – “No Tears Left To Cry” – Visual Effects by Vidal and Loris Paillier for Buf Avicii ft. Rita Ora – “Lonely Together” – Visual Effects by KPP Eminem ft. Beyoncé – “Walk On Water” – Visual Effects Supervisor Rich Lee for Drive Studios Kendrick Lamar SZA – “All The Stars” – Visual Effects by Loris Paillier for BUF Paris Maroon 5 – “Wait” – Visual Effects by TIMBER Taylor Swift – “Look What You Made Me Do” – Visual Effects by Ingenuity Studios

Bruno Mars ft. Cardi B – “Finesse (Remix)” – Choreography by Phil Tayag Bruno Mars Camila Cabello ft. Young Thug – “Havana” – Choreography by Calvit Hodge and Sara Bivens The Carters – “APESH*T” – Choreography by Sidi Larbi Cherkaoui and Jaquel Knight Childish Gambino – “This Is America” – Choreography by Sherrie Silver Dua Lipa – “IDGAF” – Choreography by Marion Motin Justin Timberlake – “Filthy” – Choreography by Marty Kudelka, AJ Harpold, Tracy Phillips and Ivan Koumaev

Bruno Mars ft. Cardi B – “Finesse (Remix)”– Editing by Jacquelyn London The Carters – “APESH*T” – Taylor Ward and Sam Ostrove Childish Gambino – “This Is America” – Editing by Ernie Gilbert Janelle Monáe – “Make Me Feel” – Editing by Deji Laray N.E.R.D Rihanna – “Lemon” – Editing by Taylor Ward Taylor Swift – “Look What You Made Me Do” – Editing by Chancler Haynes for Cosmo

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Nobody walks into the rooms of recovery with an un-checkered past. Everyone, even those not working a program of addiction recovery, has done things to others that they regret; and conversely been affected by other people's actions to the point of anger and resentment. How one is affected by the efforts of others can dramatically shape your future, impacting how one interacts with others. Sometimes anger can lead to lessons learned and moving forward, a vow to never put oneself in a position to be treated in way again. Other times, feelings about perceived treatment can linger in toxic ways, forcing one to close oneself off from others or lashing out in irrational ways for extended periods of time.

There isn’t just one way to process anger and resentment, but some ways are healthier than others—to be sure. Whether you are new to addiction recovery, or have been in the rooms for decades, it is absolutely vital that you keep those feelings in check. When compared to said “normal” people, there is a big difference between what happens to people in recovery who hold on to resentments. Even a strong program can be eroded from underneath by the corrosive effects of anger and resentment, failing to keep such feelings in check can have disastrous consequences. There is a good reason for 12-Step meeting houses hanging banners that say, ‘Resentment is the "number one" offender’ from chapter 5 in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous. Ever reminding members that holding on to such things is a slippery slope to relapse.

Letting Go of Resentment

Most addicts and alcoholics have a Ph.D. in holding on to stuff. It is so easy to convince oneself that our problems are not of our own. That somebody else made the bed and now you have to sleep in it. One tries to stuff the perceived wrongdoing deep down into the cavities of one’s mind, but inevitably the feelings will bubble to the surface to be re-lived again. Someone in active addiction will dull such feelings, or attempt to, with drugs or alcohol—and thus perpetuating the cycle of the disease. It is for such reasons that much emphasis in early recovery is placed on addressing one’s anger towards those of one’s past. The Fourth Step is dedicated to first establishing just what we are upset about, so that we can then do something about freeing yourself from it down the road.

Therein lies the crux of anger, and addressing it in recovery. What was my role? Certainly, there are times when people hurt us without cause, and one has a legitimate right to be bothered. But if you fail to let it go, the feeling only hurts you. It’s is often said that resentment is like drinking poison, hoping someone else dies. But they don’t, the alcoholic and addict is the one that pays the price.

Recovery Is A Process

With a clear mind, looking back on where you believed you were wronged almost always reveals that you had a part in the pain felt. Where you once believed that somebody did you wrong, it was actually you that owes an amends. But that comes a little later on in working the steps, to be made at a time that is decided when working with a sponsor.

There will be times that you will struggle to see the value in establishing what you are resentful about and why, especially early on in recovery. Most newcomers avoid the Fourth Step like the plague, and typically not for the reason one would think. It is usually the re-feeling (resent comes from the French word sentir which means to feel) of pain that makes people eschew this most important step, it is that deep down and if one is honest with themselves they come to realize that they are not usually the actual victim in the narrative of reality at the end of the day. But if one fails to act on such realizations, and chooses to ignore it, relapse is usually inevitable.

It may take some time for you to see the value of letting go of anger, but if you are willing to follow direction and take certain steps as people have for almost a century, recovery is possible and with it limitless possibilities. Below is part of a quote relevant to this topic, from the end of a movie,

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tags with: 12-step , Addiction Recovery , alcohol , anger , drugs , Fourth Step , newcomers , recovery , resentment , sponsor

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